LIFE JOURNEY
by Adam Penrod

Text of an Address given by Mr. Adam Penrod on Wednesday, October 13, 1999 at the Second Jerusalem Conference on the Noahide Covenant and Laws, which was sponsored by the Noah Institute of the Root & Branch Association and held at the Israel Center in Jerusalem of the Union of Orthodox Jewish Congregations of America.

MITZPE YERICHO, LIBERATED BINYAMIN, Yom Sheini (Second Day -- Monday, 29 Cheshvan, 5760 (November 8, 1999), Root & Branch: I still have vivid childhood memories of my father's search for God. His search was driven by a simple need to learn everything he could about God. His search was also the beginning of a journey for me. That journey has led to a wonderful spiritual awakening.

My dad's explorations led our family through the doors of many Churches. I can recall the noisy assemblies we found in Charismatic circles...then there were the more sedate Baptist gatherings.

During an energetic Seventh Day Adventist lecture, woven from a masterful tapestry of history and theology, I found myself mesmerized. It was stunning. Though the talk was colored with a dash of Biblical doom and rapture, I was drawn to the dramatic sagas of faith and the stirring tales of its heroes in the so-called "Old Testament.”

I remember being told that if we loyally attended the required number of lectures, we would receive a Bible. It was a King James text that came complete with a small Hebrew and Greek dictionary. That little lexicon made me aware that a translation is just a translation. It is not something on which you stake the fate of your soul.

This was the beginning of my family's Seventh Day Adventist experience and the first sign of my interest in things Biblical. That church in Moore, Oklahoma, though small, was full of love and genuine fellowship. Every Saturday, after the service, we enjoyed potluck dinners full of warm conversation. We felt it was a wonderful thing to be in that tiny Church.

My father was drawn to what he believed was a "true" form of Christianity. He felt it reflected a valid return to the roots of faith...something close to the Jewish roots.

Sometime later we left Oklahoma and that little church so that my father could attend Parker Chiropractic College in Dallas, Texas. It was in Arlington, Texas that my parents decided we should live.

It was there that we attended a lecture on Noah's Ark by a most fascinating personality. He was a Texan who expounded on the tiniest of details of the ark. Beginning his lecture from a seemingly non-related point, he merged all the elements together with seamless ease. His name was Vendyl Jones. It would be several years before I would hear that name again.

One summer day while engrossed in my favorite useless pastime -- watching television -- my parents came home to announce that they had met the "real Indiana Jones.” Roused from my boredom, I leapt up, "You mean you met Harrison Ford?!!" "No, no, no they replied, we met the real Indiana Jones, the guy they based the movie on!" they said. "Does he have a whip?" I asked.

It was, of course, the same Vendyl Jones who had spoken on the Ark. They went on to explain that even though Vendyl didn't carry a whip, that the film character was based on him. "Curious," I thought, "How could he be the real Indiana Jones and not have a whip?"

The next weekend my parents asked me if I would like to attend a Torah class taught by this real-life Indy. I wasn't too sure what a Torah class was. It sounded like some weird cult thing. I declined, unwilling to let my favored place on the couch get cold. After all, I couldn't pass up some mind numbing television show.

Thankfully, my parents didn't give up. They continued in their attempts to interest me in Torah Class...I finally joined them one Sunday afternoon.

I still remember the Torah Parsha being taught that particular day. It was Parshat Balak. I was unprepared for what would follow as I sat in class. Though I could see this was no real Indy, I could see that this older gentleman with his homespun humor was a real teacher. Vendyl's mastery of the text and his deep understanding of its meaning was remarkably apparent with every word he uttered. This down-home sage transfixed me.

As he wrapped up the Parsha, he related the zealotry of Pinchas. The Torah describes how Pinchas took his spear and pierced both the Midianite woman and the son of Israel. My first thought was, "this is in the Bible?" Vendyl continued to tell how Pinchas was able to carry the pair of them on the spear without any blood being spilled, which would have rendered him ritually defiled.

I knew that this knowledge came from some other place and not just a simple reading of the Bible. I had never been taught anything like this in Church. Listening to this master expound the Torah lit a spark in me. This spark was very small for a while, but eventually became a burning hot flame.

I continued to attend these Torah classes with my parents. But I was still calling myself a Christian. My father wanted me to read Vendyl's book "Will the Real Jesus Please Stand?" It is out of print, but somehow my father managed to get a copy.

Within its pages I discovered something startling: Vendyl denied the deity of Jesus. I was so disturbed by this concept that I was unable to finish the book. I believed that I would never pick it up again. Still, the book had cited certain issues that continued to roll around in the back of my mind. It raised serious questions that I really didn't want to answer.

It was during this same period that I harbored dreams of becoming a world-renowned comic book artist. I would sit at my drawing table and fantasize about a career drawing the likes of Superman, Batman, and the Incredible Hulk. The thought of the attendant fame and fortune drove me to improve my technique and drawing skills.

I would create worlds in my mind the likes of which had never before been dreamt of. My characters all had their place in my little universe, and I would decide their fate. I would often show my art to my parents, and relate the exciting adventures of my characters.

One day, I remember my father telling me: "There are things in life that are far more interesting than anything you can create in your mind." My first reaction was to tell him, "Thanks for not taking my life seriously.” Actually, he always has taken my life seriously. Time and a little maturity have made me realize that. Though my father's words lingered, I continued forward, in my chosen profession.

I finished high school with an eye towards attending college. I didn't really want to go to college, though. It would keep me busy until I got a job as a comic book artist. At each of the many Comic Book Conventions I attended, I would show my artwork around to all the comic book companies. At one of the tables I met a young working artist. I showed him my portfolio and he gave me his phone number. We were soon to become very good friends.

I continued to dream of breaking into the comic book field. My fantasy was, of course, to become wealthy beyond reason. I even imagined living such a spectacular existence that a movie would be made of my life story. But reality finally intruded on my little dream when I realized that you "can't take it with you." I would eventually die, and my efforts be forgotten. In the end, my life would have little meaning.

Deep in my soul I knew that there was something more to life than glory and riches. There is a Creator of the Universe who will eventually stand in judgement of my soul. I decided that it was more important to please the Creator than myself. But, I wasn't really sure how to proceed.

The artist friend from the Comic Book Convention called me one day and told me he had finally met a girl he really liked. In the past, he had complained about being single. At a comic book store in Bedford, Texas, he met a young lady whose sister was also looking for someone. He went on to tell me about their date.

The two of them had attended something called "Fire by Night.” They had listened to a preacher who managed to work them all into a frenzy of salvation. My friend was swept up in the whole thing, and that night he accepted Jesus as his lord and savior. I thought to myself, "this is amazing! Perhaps this is just what I needed.” My friend invited me to attend the service with him on the next Friday night.

The preacher was certainly electrifying. He told of his sinful past and how he eventually came to Jesus. His tale of redemption took us from one end of the emotional spectrum to the other. We were held spellbound by his dramatic, poignant tale. Finally it came. The preacher said that if we wanted to accept Jesus into our life...do it now.

I was so emotionally charged that I was compelled to join the others. I rose and said the magic words, "I accept Jesus into my life".

My friend was happy to see that I was joining him on the path to eternal life. They ushered all the new converts into a room, and explained to us how to attain a closer relationship with God. We were instructed to read the Bible on a regular basis.

Oddly, they didn't tell us to start at the beginning, in Genesis. They didn't even tell us to start with Matthew, the first book of the Gospels. We were told to begin in John. Why start in John, I wondered to myself. I didn't realize it then, but this was designed to immediately indoctrinate the new Christian into the belief of the deity of Jesus.

I went home from the emotionally charged event and opened that same Bible I had earned all those years ago at the Seventh Day Adventist lecture. Turning straight to the Gospel of John, as I was instructed, my studies began. I remembered thinking, "I don't know what's going on, or who these people are.”

My mind raced back to Vendyl and my first Torah class. I recalled the great ease with which the scriptures seemed to yield their secrets to him. I decided that the best place to start my learning was "In the beginning..."

After a couple of weeks, I felt that I should attend a Church. But I wasn't sure which one. I tried a few at random but couldn't find one I liked. By this time the emotional high from the "Fire by Night" had worn off. And no one seemed to have any real answers to all my new questions.

I was emotionally drained. I had been bought and sold in a spiritual pyramid scheme...it was multi-level marketed Christianity. The speaker revs up your emotions and before you know what you're doing you've got your wallet open, pleading with him to take your money...or your soul. That's what happened at that "Fire by Night.”

I remembered Vendyl's book and decided that I should give it another chance. As I began to read his book once again, I found myself fascinated rather than repelled. I decided that I should begin attending Torah class, again, on a regular basis, instead of going to Church.

My only hope was to pursue true understanding and beware of emotional manipulation. At this point I began to feel very hostile towards Christianity. I felt betrayed, angry, hurt, and scared as well. I felt that Christianity had lied to me. After all, the Greek ("New" Testament says, "...I am the way, the truth, and the life." [John 14:6] It was beginning to look like there wasn't much truth in the New Testament. Still it is hard to divorce oneself from the Church, and from Jesus. It is usually a bitter process.

I felt that it was time for me to set out on a new course in life. I decided to move to Oklahoma, attending the East Central University in Ada. While there I decided to attend a Bible study that my sister told me about. The Bible study would focus on the first book Genesis.

I was excited to learn Torah and by now I was more familiar with the Tanach than with the New Testament. The study was led by one of the professors on campus. We became friends and would often talk on a variety of subjects usually relevant to the Tanach. He encouraged me in my studies of the Tanach. He also encouraged me to pursue some sort of History degree, instead of the Business degree I was then pursuing.

I had come to the notice of some prominent Christian students, and during rush week I was asked to pledge the Christian fraternity. But I asked the president of the fraternity to come to my house. I needed to resolve some relevant issues before joining this group. We met at my Grandmother's house later that week. I told him that we needed to discuss the deity of Jesus. I also told him that I wanted to let him know my feelings on the trinity now, rather than later.

The problem was that I didn't think Jesus was God. He sat there for a few moments and then looked at me and said: "Well, the trinity is a very fundamental Christian belief. If you don't believe Jesus is God then you're not really a Christian." I immediately realized that he was right. I wasn't a Christian. But if I wasn't a Christian then what was I?

After the completion of the semester I decided to return to Texas to work. Back home, I knew I wanted to attend Torah class again. During my stay in Oklahoma, I had continued to seek the truth of the scriptures by other means. I would often e-mail Jim Long and Elias Baron with questions regarding Torah. Both would respond to all my inquiries. I was continuing to progress away from Christianity.

When I returned to Texas I attended the Torah classes every weekend. Jim was leading the classes while Vendyl was in Israel taking care of business. I would come to class, buy books, read, and I learned a great deal. I knew I wasn't Christian, so I was determined to find out where I fit into the great scheme of things. I knew in my heart that the Tanach was true, and that the teachings I had encountered in Torah classes came from the Jewish Sages.

Though my love of Torah was growing, I never considered conversion to Judaism. I felt that it wasn't necessary. Vendyl, who had studied Judaism for more years than I had lived, continued to live as a gentile. The question was "How do Gentiles fit into Judaism?" I soon learned that Judaism was a Universal religion. It's universal in the sense that it offers the non-Jew a relationship with God by observing the Seven Laws of No'ach. I began to realize that I had a place in God's plan...as a monotheistic gentile who observed the Seven Laws. From that moment on, I was a practicing Noachide.

As I said, the process of divorcing myself from the Church was a difficult one, though I hadn't been much of a Christian. My sister once asked me why I didn't go to Church. I told her that listening to someone preach at me, telling me I'm sinful and would burn in hell didn't do much for me.

If someone would teach me how to understand the scriptures, I would know how to live my life. I would learn how to serve God and know what is good to do and what is bad. I wasn't getting this in Church; instead I was receiving less than a surface understanding of the scriptures. I was never taught to learn and understand for myself. In Arlington, at the Torah classes led by Vendyl and Jim, I learned all of that and more.

The next fall semester I enrolled at the University of North Texas. There, I had to learn how to live as a Noachide surrounded by Christians. There were many other faiths on campus, but typically the Christians constantly and openly challenge you on your beliefs.

My 2nd semester I began working at McConnell Hall as a resident assistant. While there, I met several good and honest Christians. But I was confronted on a regular basis with the challenges of Christianity. My Christian friends provoked me to search even more earnestly. I had to discover what I, as a Noachide, really believed.

This constant challenge to my faith has helped me to grow stronger. I soon began to realize that although I was no longer a Christian, I would still look at an issue with the eyes of a Christian. I was often surprised to learn that on a lot of issues Christianity and Judaism were at opposites with one another. I once thought that the only thing that Christianity and Judaism disagreed on was that Jesus was the Messiah, and the deity of Jesus. I was very wrong. I realized that I still had much to learn.

I became very cautious at expressing my diehard opinion. On one occasion, a Christian friend of mine asked me what I thought about sin. I told him I wasn't sure. I understood sin and atonement from a Christian perspective, but was still trying to grasp the Torah perspective. I recalled a lecture given by Rabbi Tovia Singer of Outreach Judaism. Rabbi Singer's lecture dealt with the differences between the Christian concept of the devil and the Jewish concept. As I was sitting in my room, contemplating the difference between the Church and Judaism, it occurred to me that Rabbi Singer might have a website. To my immense pleasure I found that he did. It would prove to be a vital source of knowledge. It gave me strength and resolved many doubts while allowing me to respond to my Christian friends.

God has led me, on this journey for truth, to the Torah. The Torah has allowed me to grow in knowledge. That knowledge has given me a solid foundation for my beliefs. This journey would have faltered long ago if my path had not been illuminated by the Jewish Sages. I now know that we Noahides cannot make our journey without the leadership of God's appointed priests and teachers...the Children of Israel. When left to our own devices, we stumble on the path...

Early Christianity was a sect that grew out of Judaism. With Paul at its head, it sought out gentile converts. These early Christian gentile converts began as Noachides, but Christianity cut ties with the Jewish people. Christians had to decide many issues on their own. Men who came from pagan backgrounds made these decisions. They were dissatisfied with the faith of their fathers, which were the pagan religions of the past. They were attracted to Christianity, which would pass itself off as a monotheistic religion. With the influx of pagans into the ranks of Christianity it ceased to be monotheistic.

The Ben Noach faces a similar challenge today. A new Noahide usually comes from a Christian background. He will often view issues regarding Torah through the stained-glass lens of Christianity, without even realizing it.

It is my concern that contemporary Noahides might begin to err along similar lines as early Christianity. We need rabbinical leadership to keep B'nai Noach on the proper path. I fear that some Noahides will begin missionary work among other Gentiles. With their newfound zeal for the Torah, they may start going door to door wanting to share this wonderful truth, wanting to "win souls,” so to speak. It is my hope that the present Noahide movement would look to our Jewish brothers as an example.

We should concentrate on inner perfection of ourselves; to try and ascend the heavenly ladder to a closer relationship with the Creator. When you begin self-perfection, you will have an effect on people greater than anything you would ever have by spending millions of dollars on popularizing your beliefs. It becomes a qualitative effect, and not a quantitative effect. The former is of more value than the latter.

I also feel that it is prudent for Noachides to stay clear of any "messianic" groups. No matter how "kosher" they may appear to be, why make the same mistakes? The identity of the Meshiach does not determine our place in the world to come. Those new to B'nai Noach might mistakenly join such groups and this could prove troublesome in the future.

I also believe that we should clearly define the role of B'nai Noach. In Judaism it is very clear that the words "B'nai Noach" can refer to all mankind, since all men are descended from Noach. However, the term "B'nai No'ach" has evolved to reflect a specific belief system for certain non-Jews. This is important to define.

B'nai Noach in the modern sense should be defined something like: "A specific group of Gentiles who observe the Seven Laws of Noach and who have accepted the authority of Torah-observant ("orthodox" rabbis". Perhaps this definition needs a little work, but I believe that it is necessary to prevent confusion in the future.

It is likely that Christians who come in contact with the Seven Laws of Noach might mistakenly assume that they are observing all Seven Laws. Although many believe in the Trinity, those same Christians somehow believe they are monotheistic. It is clear that those Christians are violating the Noahide law against Idolatry, but it is sin through ignorance.

Oddly, to a modern Christian, the Trinity seems to be a perfectly rational form of worship for them, and somehow does not appear to violate the sanctity of the Unity of HASHEM. I have learned that it is necessary to be patient with Christians who are attempting to understand B'nai Noach or Judaism.

We also need help with such issues as how to keep B'nai Noach an organism, and not an organization. There are many issues that we need rabbinical leadership to solve. What is needed is a Sanhedrin to rule on these important matters, to help outline the relationship of the Children of Israel with the Children of Noach, and to aid us in learning our responsibilities to one another. We also need it for the benefit of deciding Halakah (legal questions) for B'nai Noach.

As I progressed away from the Church many people helped me. Foremost were my parents, who encouraged my search for truth. They have always been very supportive of me, and I have the utmost respect for both of them. Without my Father's own search for the truth, I would never have learned how to seek, to question. I would have continued to accept the "obvious" and ignore the truth.

My father has also always encouraged me to remain tolerant of those who are still searching. My mother has always helped me to balance my thirst for knowledge with a desire for spiritual enlightenment and wisdom. Vendyl Jones and Jim Long served as my first Torah teachers, pointing me in the right direction and allowing me to choose my own path. There are others in the Torah class who have supported me and taught me.

Now I am in the Holy Land -- the Land of Israel -- learning from the Holy Nation of Israel. Truly, they are a Nation of Priests and each one is my teacher. My Christian friends have asked me in the past, "How have the Jews served as a light to the Nations?" If only we have eyes to see, every Son and Daughter of Israel is a teacher. I learn from the righteous as well as the wicked, the successful and the one that's only known failure. Every Jewish person, n, no matter how observant, h,, as taught me something.

It is from the observant Jews, though, that I have received the greatest teachings. Selflessly and joyfully they have begun to share with me the beauties and wonders of their Torah. This is how it should be: the Children of Israel are the light to the Nations. It is a light that continues to guide me on my life's journey.

Baruch HaShem.

Shalom from Mitzpe Yericho
Adam Penrod

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